You judge a tree by its Fruit. Have you ever figured something out far too long after you should have? That’s the story of my life. It hit me in a new way today thinking about judging a tree by its fruit. The fruit is how the tree is known and the tree is known for little else. An Apple tree is known for its apples and orange tree its oranges. Amazing how slow I can be sometimes.
So I wonder what kind of fruit I am bearing. Some trees bear fruit all year round, some don’t get enough rain and dry up. Am I bearing fruit, or am I a tree that seems to be scarce and not very reliable.
Lately I have been reading an 18 century mystic who has been writing about how we spend our free time. He says that how we spend our free time directly effects our work time, and our social time. He says that how we spend our alone time can make all the difference in the world in how joyful we are and how effective we will be. He says that when we spend our alone time wisely that we can enjoy every moment of every day before God in bliss. I believe him.
But I also struggle with doing things that I don’t want to do. I get home from work and I can’t resist some enjoyments, like playing a video game or getting online and wasting time. I’m not saying those things are wrong or that even there is a time to do those things. My point is that I don’t want to do those things… I want to be in the pure and sweet presence of the Lord. I want to go to Him in prayer and let my heart be healed from the wear of the day.
This is where most of my days land. I stand in the middle of desert knowing that the Promised Land is just around the corner and yet stumbling over my own feet.
Lord here it is… if it were not for your grace I would not stand. I don’t reserve any of my heart for me. It’s all yours, where would I go Lord for you have the words of life. Lord, I am learning to consistently wait on you, help me to not grow weary in patience. Help me to further know your voice. I have been hearing you and yet now I am beginning to know your character, which is specific and interesting. Lord it scares me that you are more real and defined than I knew. Help me to draw near. Help me to put myself in the fire that forges. Let me not be scared of your ways. Cleanse me from my religion and strip away my misunderstanding. No reserve Lord I’m yours. My only will is yours.